Seed-Faith Living.

I've only got ten minutes.

I felt like I didn't have much to look forward to this week; it began with me standing Colors six times, getting into a faux-pas with Leigh because I'd waited for her to finish tailoring a skin before sleeping,

(Each stand of Colors consists of two portions. I stood morning, evening, and then they called me out of the shower to stand someone elses when they didn't show up to do it, as well.)

 and then I followed it up by standing the 0315 to 0515 Quarterdeck Watch, which means I got up at 0400 and slept at 0515 the next day, really.

After 0515, I wake up at 0630 to dress, clean, and fall out for work.

But it's not true. I've got a lot to look forward to; I take the first step as a married man in sharing my life with Leigh today. Bleet's latest edition of Fleshchild wasn't released yet, so it's bound to come out sometime this week, instead. And even though I'm somewhat stressed about my next brief, I know God and Leigh will get me through it, like they always have.

Lately, when I fall into moods like this, where I feel like I'm making mistakes, like I can see the future because I repeat the same routine, and like I'm measuring the day by how much work I have to do less than the next, I pray about it.

I've always used a very standard prayer that I've used since I were small, and then I tend to tack on anything extra, pressing, or particularly solemn afterwards, but lately I've been reading instead from my recently-departed Grandmother's prayerbook, 'Seed-Faith Living,' by her favorite Pastor, who watched over her as she died, Pastor Oral Roberts of Tulsa, Oklahoma.

I want to share some of those prayers with you.
If it doesn't help you to pray or something, maybe it'll just tell you the kinds of things I worry about and what I think, say, and do to help overcome them.

...But my ten minutes was up two minutes ago. I'll tell you later, I promise.

What did I tell you? Here I am to type out a bunch of theological quotes over a bowl of kimchi noodles and a lukewarm Coca-Cola.

WHEN YOU ARE OVERWHELMED WITH A PROBLEM
Lord, I come today praying a You taught us to pray, "Our Father which art in Heaven, Hallowed be thy name... Thy will be done on Earth, as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread."
Lord, I have a great need. In fact, my need has become so large that it defies solution. It had brought me down to zero.
But in the midst of this problem, I look again to You as my Source. And I pray that Your will will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven. That this day, Now, I will receive my daily bread - the solution to my problem.
For I ask this in the great and incomperable name of Your Son, Jesus of Nazareth - whose I am and whom I serve.

WHEN YOU ARE DEPRESSED
Lord, dispel from my mind all doubt of your goodness. All gloom and depression. Let the inflow of Your love and power bring strength, and peace, and joy without measure. May I feel you, now, this instant, that my spirit will be uplifted. That I may go forward in the comfort of Your abiding presence.
I pray in the name of Christ, my Redeemer. Amen.

WHEN YOU ARE FRUSTRATED
Heavenly Father, cast out of my heart those faithless fears that rob me of your peace.
Your Word says, "Be still, and know I am God." So settle me down, Lord. Bring a quietness in my spirit. Shut out the noise and confusion, the frustrations, the rat-race of this day. Until I am at peace before You, and You can be God to me.
I pray in Your name. Amen.

WHEN FACING THE UNKNOWN
Wonderful Lord, Your presence and love fill me. In the secret places of my soul, I hear Your voice saying to me, "This is the way, walk ye in it." And so, I walk in it.
As I pray, Lord, I wonder about the future. It's all so uncertain, and a bit frightening.
But my hope is strengthened by walking and talking with You. I cannot be afraid for long because my way is made clear by the shining light of Your presence. You are by my side; therefore, I am strong. I am full of faith because you are my Guide. You are my way. Now, Lord, guide me and I will be careful to give You the praise, for I asked this in the name of Christ my loving Savior. Amen.

Toil and Trouble.

Hey there, I know it's been a really long time, and I know I've not really been keeping my word to post here often, but in between stuff, I just don't have a whole lot of time; I'm lucky to spend and hour or two writing with Leigh or punching people in GetAmped 2 at all - speaking of which, I got an absolutely lovely skin of Skullgirls Double which is really neat; I confess Leigh wears it far better than I do - when she uses Chaos Heretic, her Nun's Habit merges seamlessly with the black hell-puddle it makes on the floor.

Really neat - if had some super grimdark accessories to go with it, I'd totally dish them out.
Unfortunately, there's none that particularly draw my attention; Black Rain might have been cool, I guess.
Cursed Cross is really neat, but I have it in -such- an ugly color. Its inherit is still pretty nifty.
I don't know - I'll think of something splendid for it, I'm certain.

Speaking further of GetAmped 2, I logged in today at 5:00 to find my room had been messied-up a bit, and the cherry on the sundae? A great big love-letter tacked to my wall.
You have no idea how good that gets you in the heart. Makes you feel delightful...

I've been stressing out over work. We've been getting these heft evaluation tests - if you fail one, you risk being classed-back, which typically comes with zero mercy - they simply spit you back to the very beginning and make you start IS-A all over again. It's getting into some very nitty-gritty stuff, and I'm being forced to go in after hours if I even want to come close to maintaining my 92% rating.

The Rating doesn't mean anything, which is just the opposite you would expect.
A Positive Eval is exclusively for the purpose of seeing if you're remotely worth giving a reasonable deployment to: if I don't want to be at sea for a couple months, a 92% mandatory...

But I'm being forced to learn the make-up of entire country's armies and it's just... Absolutely dreadful.
From Surface to Air platforms to fittings on planes, and how to identify them solely upon looks.
It's very, very stressful, to say the least...

I try and make it by through playing favorites; something I do everywhere.

My favorite Surface-to-Air Missile Platform?

Might I introduce you to the SA-5 Gammon.

It just looks very Powerpuff Girls. Like one of those Supervillain Weapons. 

I don't know. I need to quit stalling and get back to work.

For the record, I can't tell you anything about the Gammon, nor anything about other platforms.

I can't really tell you a thing about my job, save that I'm very, very busy right now and that the material is very densely packed.

I hope you're all doing well, and Leigh, if you're reading this, I love you immensely.