It's been a long time since I've felt confident enough to sit back and make an Eraserdoodle. I've tried, and I've tried, and I've tried, and I've more or less erased a few portions of structure only to erase them and give up. This is why after all my planning, I haven't drawn Sabina's character Lazuli as much as I want to because of the pretty cool Back-and-Forth she and Birdgette had once upon a time.
I've been a bit of a wreck as of late.
I made a decision I'm still sort of struggling with.
I made Emily some chocolate roses, and then realized I could only fit two in a box as well, which makes me feel like a douche. Hell, mailing them seems like a bit of a Judas' Kiss.
I don't know.
All the same, I did an Eraserdoodle for the first time in a long time.
Here's my friend, Swing. With her head-taking knife.
I encourage you to click it as it's quite large.
It's, more or less, my only full-body doodle so far.
I was apparently on a trip. My little sister had accompanied me and it was just us. We were in a part of New York we had never been to - a very small-town portion of it - parted at a small auto-shop that seemed to also serve as a gas-station and the home of the proprietor.
We were fueling-up and picking up some small snacks, as we usually do when we're on long trips together. While pouring gas, the owner of the store approached me. He was a charming, casual guy but something about him made me immediately distrustful.
He asked me if I were familiar with the town and immediately and somewhat derisively I said I infact were, so that he wouldn't be obliged to stay around me and tell me about the town. My bid to lose him failed because he stuck around talking about Vespa motor-scooters with my sister.
He said, "Basically, you just slap an engine under a regular scooter," and was showing her one that he had in the shop, and the various switches and buttons on it, and how it had under-seat storage, which he thought she would like as a trendy girl who shops a lot.
She was surprisingly sold on the idea; I had tried to get a Vespa several years ago and she'd told me it were a stupid idea, so in my dream I was quite impressed with his ability to change her opinion on them. We got back in the car and she asked me to take a picture for her. Apparently, she had a page of homework she was supposed to have mailed-in for school and she wanted to send a picture to show she'd completed it.
I had packed my camera, but no memory-card was in it.
Sometime between realizing that, the man from the auto-shop offered to help her with it. I was thankful because she was starting to panic and cry. He asked to take a picture of her holding a sheet of paper that read "MOM" on it so that my mother wouldn't "wouldn't think she were receiving mail from a creep," and then he beckoned her into the shop and I moved to follow when a man caught the hood of the hooded sweater I was wearing and pulled very hard, pinwheeling me backward and hefting me over his shoulder.
He had a very deep voice and he explained that the store-owner was going to rape my sister. "It's jus' a little child labor," he joked, in exchange for the favor with the homework. He also explained that the picture of her holding the sign that said "MOM" was actually going to be used as a ransom note.
I thought he was going to throw me into a tool-closet or a shop-room, but the man took me into his room. He claimed to have known me from Online, and had a lot of pornography pulled up in his browser, which he said was for "setting the mood." He made it very clear he intended to rape me as a consolation prize. I began to panic. I tried to appeal to him.
I said "You have to let me go, that's my sister, she needs help," and "Please don't do this."
After I said, "Please don't do this," he laughed and closed the porn in his browser, saying "Alright - we'll skip the movie, then." and he pinned me beneath himself. I abruptly woke up at 2:43 AM.
This is going to be a pretty long-ass post if I have my way with it, because I've been meaning to write for like, ever, and I just haven't had the time to. If you couldn't tell by the kissu-kissu fall in rabu title, it's my birthday, but that'll be the last thing on the agenda to talk about because there's simply so much else going on.
I don't know where to start in order to progress and a linear and coherent pattern as my coffee has not quite kicked-in, so to speak, so I'm just going to begin with the Two Dollars and a Tomato story.
No, crap. I can't do that, because I mention something else that happened to me in it.
Okay, look. I've enlisted into the Navy. It took two days of processing. I signed and fingerprinted a document that swore away the next decade of my life, which is kind of spooky. The people in my unit are, by callsign:
Ukie - A Ukrainian Nuclear-Tech. Callsign derived from his homeland, and pronounced "Yuki."
Beemer - A girl who drives a Beemer. Has to report as "Entry-Level Backstabber" after screwing-over her recruiter.
Pain-In-The-Ass - A guy who had an extensive processing and a lengthy paperwork form to be a Rescue Swimmer.
Tomb Raider - A guy who plays a lot of video-games. Tall, lanky, and nerdy.
Crackerjack - Me. Taken from a remark wherein my Father said the Navy was comprised of "Squids, Crackerjacks, and Swabbies."
They gave me an Intelligence Specialist position right off the bat, which is exceptionally unusual, and I ship out in March unless I put in for a roulette for someone else's shipdate. I'm taking at least a month to get fitter before I put in for the lottery-thing. This brings me to my next story, the Two Dollars and a Tomato story:
While processing-in, I was surprised to discover that while I am of respectable fitness, there were a few guys still bulkier and fitter than I. I don't want to lose-out to these guys for leadership positions in Basic, because I want an E-3 Paygrade. Naturally, that means working out more, but my Gym Membership has since expired. I took to cycling yesterday. It was raining lightly when I did so, and I liked it. Suddenly, however, it began RAINING SIDEWAYS and became a TORRENTIAL-FUCKIN'-DOWNPOUR. A vegetable stand I passed on the first half of my eight mile cycle was actually BLOWN THE FUCK OVER by the sheer force of the wind. This made me really sad somehow, so I paused and I started piling up the tomatoes and lettuce it was selling and putting them back into their little baskets. The owner of the stand and his son came out and gave me two dollars, a tomato, and advice to stay on the city sidewalks, because they didn't want me to get hit by a car. He also offered me a ride despite me being soaked-through and I explained I was trying to get fitter for the Navy. I tried to decline the money but he literally reached into my pocket and crammed it in there with his hand.
It was, without a doubt, the most brutal bike-ride I've ever been on. My legs were screaming, and going uphill with the wind blowing from the opposite direction and shit bouncing off your face at like, mach ten required me making like, Super Saiyan noises. You know the ones:
haaaaahhhhhhAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
Anyway, it sucked. My legs are killing me. Unfortunately, I've got no time to let 'em rest because I was volunteered by my mother to go in and work with the kids at Church today, despite the aforementioned fact that it is my birthday. Worse still, I get to tag along with my Father for more military shenanigans. Naturally, I woke up early so that there is a significantly larger portion of this day that I can ACTUALLY ENJOY.
I spent the evening last night talking with Swing and Sabina. Poor Sabina's had a shit time, recently. Her cat caught one of her pet birds and brought her the corpse like a present. Moreover, her tablet's recently broken, so she cannot draw, which is like, her favorite thing to do. Seeing as she can't draw right now, I thought I'd show off a bit more of her work, alongside her girlfriend Annie's, and some of Shawn's work now that he's given me permission to show it. I also drew a picture I'll explain later. And ordered a pizza I'll explain later. Look, for all intents and purposes, this is just the part of the blog where I post a METRIC ASSLOAD of pictures:
From Sabina, I'd like to present the following:
From Annie, I'd like to present the following:
From Shawn, I have been given permission to post BUT A SINGLE PICTURE:
And from my personal collection of pixillated garbage, I'd like to present a picture I'd drawn for Maid Army. With myself fighting with a Bible, and Swing fighting with Test-Tubes, Bible-tan and Science-tan have become running characters between us:
Which reminds me, I need to update Maid Army's catalogue of inside jokes.
Also, a ways back, I posted pictures of pizzaboxes. I have a small collection of photos of them. Allow me to explain. I am friends with people who occasionally are short on food. When they are, I purchase them a pizza when I can afford to, and have the delivery-man write STUPID IN-JOKES on the boxes. Among such things were requesting the Pizza-Boy shamelessly flirt with Reimu, writing "Did Somebunny Order a Pizza?" on Inaba's pizza, and most recently getting "KIK BIBEL" written on Swing's.
Behold my glorious works, ye mighty, and dispair:
In conclusion, it's my Birthday.
I hope you've enjoyed "Happy Birthday to Me," by Bulldog Mansion.
That said, I'm going to go now and prepare for work and military shit.
I've been trying to draw pixelated things, as a lot of my favorite artists do.
I'm not particularly amazing at it.
I'm officially a Gym-Teacher for little Church-Kids.
Go-Go Yuugi-modo.
As I mentioned last time, I swear into the Navy soon.
Still in sort of a weird mood. I'm getting better though.
Gonna have a good day today, I know it.
